Dick & Doyle's Adventures (aka Kassandra & Trine)

”Do you think mommy and daddy love each other?” the little girl behind us in the bus asked her big brother.

“Of course, do you know what love is? Love is when mommy makes coffee for daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is okay,” he answered cleverly and she kept asking the same kind of questions like a real chatterbox.

It was such a huge cultural difference from where we came from. Back home children would never think this way, their worst worries were about who should play with the game boy first. We were on the bus up the hills where we would stop at some point and had to hike the rest of the way into the forest. I looked out the front window of the bus and saw a tunnel ahead of us; it had a big sign saying “If Tunnel Is Dark Please Remove Sunglasses” and I took off my sunglasses, because I knew it would be dark. I had to pee and asked the bus driver to stop so I could take a piss, but then the bus stopped and we were finally there, it was only noon. The bus had to drive on fast because of the sign saying “Limousine parking only, All others will be towed.” I was imagining how a big bus would be towed. We looked around us and on the right side there was a wooden chapel with the sign, “No food or beverages in the chapel”, on the other side, was the Vega path and we had to cross the road to get there. We stopped by the sign saying “Push button to cross”, which I found weird, since there were no cars around.

We walked through the path watching nature and Dick noticed some footprints of some bird. I thought it might be from a blackbird and later on we saw some owl spit-up, while listening to the nightingale singing in the dark. We stumbled into two other guys hiking; their names were Ben and Jerry.

“I had to chop some wood this weekend.” Ben said.

“Yeah?” Dick wondered.

“Yeah. We didn’t have any electricity.” Jerry answered.

“Oh, like right now?” I said and thought he might be on acid.

“Yes, don’t mind Jerry, he’s a bit dumb and has the reflections of an elephant,” Ben said and Jerry punched him in the face. They seemed a bit odd, but they invited us over to taste some Heinz baked beans so we went along to their little cabin called the Kennedy Slum Hut. They had a strange sense of humor and they called their bedrooms ‘Imperial Bedrooms’. Their cooking was weird as well, but I gotta tell you shallots, baked beans with garlic and sweet potatoes are yummy when you put them together. I was amazed by how they only had a rake, hammer and saw in their kitchen, but they made it work. Afterwards we saw Ben & Jerry’s AK-47 and we ran off out into the woods.